Want versus Not Want

Often we find ourselves thinking or talking about the things we do not want in life…

‘I don’t want to feel tired all the time’

‘I don’t want to do this job anymore’

Unfortunately the brain is somewhat biased towards negatives so rather than feeling less tired or doing something about your job you just continue to feel tired and continue to dislike your job.

However, if you turn these statements around…

‘I want to feel energised’

‘I want a job I love’

…you start to move towards a positive which feels considerably better.  This opens the mind to thinking about what you could to do in order to feel more energised and to love your job.

‘To feel more energised I could…’

‘To have a job I love I could…’

Practice this way of thinking as much as possible during your day. Whenever you find yourself thinking or saying ‘I don’t want’ or ‘I don’t like’ turn them into ‘I want…’ and ‘I would like…’

If we can see the good in our everyday lives this will help to lift our optimism levels which in turn will put us in a better frame of mind for improving the more difficult issues going on in our lives.


Watch this Ted X talk for further explanation…it’s just 10 minutes long!  Oh and please try not to just go onto the next video 🙂 At the very least THINK about the message HERE first! 🙂

So as Alison Ledgerwood explains our brains do find it more difficult to focus on the positive particularly when we have had a negative experience.

But the good news is that we can train our brains to think differently and focusing on WANT rather than NOT WANT gives us the capacity to do just that.

So try it now.  Reframe something that you are always saying you do not want into something  you DO WANT.  It will require a little thought because you are SO familiar with what you DON’T want!

This constant negative in your life is trying to be helpful though.  It’s your brain’s way of hammering at your door screaming I DON’T WANT THIS!! It’s like a small child throwing a tantrum hoping that you will come to it’s rescue and offer alternatives.

What are the alternatives?  List them and I promise you will start to see your negative issues in a more positive light.

And to help you I have created a free sheet for you to fill in your DON’T WANTS, convert them to DO WANTS and work out how to GET what YOU WANT.  Click the button below!



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